The Need to be Heard by Someone in Particular

Photo by Oleg Laptev on Unsplash

A client told me a familiar story recently. A direct report didn't like a change happening within their organization - an 800-person company - so they cornered the CEO and CFO at a charity dinner to vent their frustrations.

The familiar story is that they - the unhappy person - wanted to be heard by someone in particular.

It wasn't enough that their own manager had flown down twice to meet them during the pandemic.

It wasn't enough that they'd had multiple conversations with peers and other leaders within the organization.

What they wanted was someone in particular.

A theme I've consistently noticed in the past two decades of leadership revolves around a repeated comment: No one listened to me.

Really? No one. 

In that great organization that's doing amazing things and helping people thrive - you couldn't find a single person who'd listen to you?!?! 

No one listened to me is code: "I want to be heard by someone in particular." 

Usually, the CEO or a senior leader. They want face-time with the executive. Or, at the very least, they want their every idea to be treated like it was coming straight from the Board chair.

"I want to be heard" often means "I want THAT person - them/they/her/him - I want to be heard by them in particular."

So the next time someone in your team is looking for a listening ear, maybe ask them, "are you looking to be heard?" 

Or are you looking to be heard by someone in particular?

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